A Co-Regulation Exercise: Lean Into Being Playful with Your Animal

Have you ever watched animals play? They might roughhouse with each other or call out to one another through different means of communication. All animals, including us, need to engage in play. It’s not surprising that playing comes more naturally to young animals or children who want to discover their world. Sometimes, as we get older, we forget about play.

For this exercise, I want you to engage in play with your animal. My horse, Casper, and I love to run around at liberty. I will engage him with excitement in my body, start running at full speed, and he will chase me. After a few moments, I stop suddenly, challenging him to follow my lead, and then we are off again. Casper loves this. I think it is one of his favourite things to do with me, and he is always licking and chewing as we go along. What I like so much about this is that it is unstructured, has no agenda or pressure, is a little bit silly, and all about fun. Doing something simple like this teaches him and I to engage in play together and creates a safe space to do it. I always feel better afterwards, and I know he does too.

How you engage in play with your animal does not need to look like mine. It could be supporting them to play with an object, it could be just enjoying time together with no agenda, or even having a conversation with your animal over a morning cup of coffee. Whatever play might look like to you, it should have a positive effect, allowing you to tap into feeling carefree, joyful, and fun.

When we play together, we regulate together. As you do this, notice how you are feeling within your nervous system, and how you feel in your body. At the same time, pay attention to your animal and how they are responding to their body, breathing, or interactions.

Begin integrating play, even for a short while, into your life consistently. Maybe it starts with 10 minutes a week, then a few times a week, then daily. Practice whatever consistency might work for you. Notice how both you and your animal feel after the play, again paying attention to your nervous system. If you do not have access to animals consistently, you can still integrate play into your own life. This might look like: playing more with your kids or partner, or engaging in playful activities like dancing around the house or even singing in your car.

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